Whenever the topic of sex toys comes up in a group conversation, it’s always interesting to see the reactions. Some get excited and giddy, some shy away while others take a firm stance against the thought of bringing a “foreign object” into the bedroom. And it’s also interesting to see that the latter bunch are usually the guys. Why is that? What are men so afraid of?
It is assumed that this illogical fear is hundreds of years in the making. Men have been assigned the gender role of “provider” and if they feel they cannot provide pleasure to their woman, but a tiny piece of silicone can, then they might be deemed inferior or inadequate. As you read this you can probably feel yourself cringing at how narrow-minded that perspective is, especially in this day and age.
The other notion is the fear that a sex toy will replace the man. A typical response we often get from men is “My wife/girlfriend doesn’t need a sex toy, she has me.” Gone are the days of sex toys being associated with porn or dodgy adult shops. Technology and women empowerment has come a very long way since then, and it seems that men have been struggling to keep up. If a lady wants to get a sex toy, she doesn’t need a man’s permission.
So how do we help our men get over this? It’s a simple shift in mindset. And this can only be achieved through communication. We need to explain to our men that a introducing a toy into the bedroom is not a replacement, but an add-on. The toy’s purpose is to improve on an already fun activity and should be enjoyed together.
Once the tension has eased, start experimenting! Make a whole adventure out of it! Do some online research together, go shopping together. Start with something small just to try out the water and perhaps start building a collection together. There are amazing toys out there not just for women, but specifically designed for couples and men.
A change of perspective can open an entire new world for any couple.
Since when was playing with toys and a friend not fun?
~ Moonlight Candy Team